The Porn Star & the Mime

The headline read "Monrovia victim ID'd as porn actress". Naturally it caught my attention b/c I live right near Monrovia in Southern CA. As I read about her, I processed through the ache in my heart as I thought about her life. I wondered if she had any self respect, or if she understood her value. From the first line I was left emotional. However, nothing could have prepared for me for the final paragraph of the article.

Have you ever heard of Brian Randone? He gradated from Moody Bible Institute where my husband Sam went to school. He also went to a divinity school in TX. He is a preacher with a website that talks about hell. He is this amazing mime who travels all over teaching, through pantomime, about how the little sins left in our life become unmanageable, burdensome, big sins if we don't deal with them...oh wait...let me clarify...he used to preach and travel...now he's in jail for torturing and murdering his girlfriend...the porn star. Really?

The end of this story was very unsettling because it hit too close to home. Here was a guy who graduated from 2 very conservative, upstanding Bible schools. He was in ministry; ministry that highlighted the dangers of secret sin. He knew his Bible well, and he had given his life to serving Christ. So what went wrong?

When evil happens, when people of faith turn away, only God has the answer to the question, "why?" I will never be able to know Brian's heart. I don't believe I am capable of making sense of this tragedy. However, I can make a choice today that will help keep me from becoming another casualty. Let's wade deeply through the Scriptures and get some God insights! What is He teaching us?

Ro 8:31-39 - What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us? Since he did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for us all, won’t he also give us everything else? Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one—for God himself has given us right standing with himself. Who then will condemn us? No one—for Christ Jesus died for us and was raised to life for us, and he is sitting in the place of honor at God’s right hand, pleading for us. Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death?...No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.

1 John 1:9 - But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.

John 13:34 - So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other.

1 Co 10:13 - The temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you can endure.

Matt 6:33 - Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.

Ja 4:7 - So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

Ro 12:1-2 - And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

Ro 7:18-25 - And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. I want to do what is right, but I can’t. I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway. But if I do what I don’t want to do, I am not really the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it. I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. I love God’s law with all my heart. But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin.

Eph 6:10-18 - A final word: Be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on all of God’s armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all strategies of the devil. For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places. Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm. Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’s righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared. In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil. Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all believers everywhere.

Heb 12:28-29 - Since we are receiving a Kingdom that is unshakable, let us be thankful and please God by worshiping him with holy fear and awe. For our God is a devouring (consuming) fire.

Ja 5:16 - Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.

Ja 5:19-20 - My dear brothers and sisters, if someone among you wanders away from the truth and is brought back, you can be sure that whoever brings the sinner back will save that person from death and bring about the forgiveness of many sins.

Join me in asking the tough questions:

• His love - do you bask in His love for you? Seriously...do you spend time thinking about how much He loves you??
• Our sin - do you understand what it cost our God to bring forgiveness to us?
• Understanding forgiveness - do you really believe and relish the truth that your confession before the Lord brings forgiveness, freedom and healing from sin? Or, do you beat yourself up over your sin, lose heart, and give up?
• Our posture before Him - are you humble and dependent or prideful and independent? Are you overflowing with thankfulness or spilling over with complaining?
• Our choice: Self-centered or God-centered - do you live to please yourself, or the One who called you by name?
• Accountability/Confession - are you willing to tell others when you're struggling, confess your sins, and be held accountable?
  

As I laid down the newspaper I was reminded of my humanness and frailty...and my deep need for Jesus. Somewhere along Brian's journey he lost his first love...and it cost him his freedom...and his life. Please God...keep my feet from evil (Prov 4:27). Amen.

Love in the Moment...

Ephesians 5:16 - Make the most of every opportunity...

Acts 20:2 - While there, he (Paul) encouraged the believers
in all the towns he passed through...

When you’ve been someplace 12 years...and you are me...you take an oh so dramatic pause and reflect on the time spent with people. I wondered if I’d been a good friend and if I’d wisely used my time to love and build into others in a way that most honored the Lord?

It’s sad, but we often don’t realize what we have right in front of us until it is gone...or almost gone. As humans, we take so much for granted. We rush through life...passing by beautiful flowers and beautiful people. We are so busy that it’s easy to lose sight of what is really important...helping others know that they are “seen”, “heard”, important, valuable and cherished!

When is the last time you called a friend to say, “I’m so thankful for our friendship!” Have you ever sent a text to someone letting them know what you admire about them? Have you ever set aside an important thing you were doing b/c someone just needed you to listen to them? When is the last time you went out of your way to serve a person in need? Do you ever give out random hugs to people who need to know you care about them? When is the last time you picked up an inexpensive gift for someone just so they’d know you were thinking about them? And when is the last time you thought, “how can I be Jesus to someone today?”

As I journey through life, I want to stay aware of others. I want the lady at Wal-Mart, the server at the restaurant, the awesome masterpiece at camp, an older person at church, my next door neighbor, the little kids that feel lost and alone, or my long time friend, to know that I “see” them...“hear” them. I want them to know by my words and actions that I think they are important, valuable, and cherished.

As I seek to love others with my words and actions, I will be more like Jesus. He is amazing at “seeing” us, “hearing” us, and making us feel valuable and cherished. Let’s follow His example. Just imagine what the world would be like if we all took the time to enjoy the beautiful people God places in our life...before they are gone...

Be a difference maker. From this moment on resolve to let those around you know that they are valuable! Be creative! Share stories with me. I’d love to hear how God uses you to express the love of Jesus to someone today!

Think about it:

• Whom have I taken for granted lately?
• What creative thing can I do to tell someone or show someone that they are important to me?
• Am I so busy that I don’t have time to “see” or “hear” the people around me?
• Would others consider me a good friend? (ask some of your friends)
• What is one Bible passage that highlights Jesus or another person reaching out to someone who needed to feel valued and cherished?
• Am I willing to pray, “Father, help me to be Jesus to someone today” and then watch expectantly for Him to provide an opportunity?

The Heavenly Duet...

How thankful I have always been for the Scriptural mandate to make a “joyful noise” to the Lord. As someone not known for a melodious and beautiful voice, the thought that God would actually want to hear my “noises” is quite comforting. And joyful...it is always an attitude of the heart that I am capable of maintaining through the power of the Holy Spirit.

Zephaniah 3:17

For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With His love, He will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.

Psalm 42:8

But each day the Lord pours His unfailing love upon me, and through each night I sing His songs, praying to God who gives me life.

When placed side by side, Zeph 3:17 and Ps 42:8 paint the picture of a glorious place where our hearts intersect and connect with God’s. Pausing to wonder on the beauty of a heavenly duet opens our eyes to yet another level of intimacy with God we often overlook. The Creator of the universe, the Savior of the world, our Father and our Friend, desires us to be on His worship team.

Imagine...as you sing your praises to the Lord Most High, He is singing over you! Can you envision the Heavenly beings, those glorious angelic hosts, dancing and laughing at the wonder of the Heavenly duet. For them, it is another mystery into which they long to look. Our intimacy and communion with our God is sacred and beautiful. Angels marvel, and so should we. Today, won’t you be a part of the celebration? God invites you, beckons you, to join the ultimate worship team!

As a Masterpiece you are called to make a joyful “noise”! In Heaven there are no tryouts...just open extended arms inviting us in to the Heavenly duet!

Reflection/Prayer:

Do I spend more time praising or complaining?

Do I see the importance of making a “joyful noise” to the Lord? What is a “joyful noise”?

How does knowing and understanding that God is “singing over me” change or improve my view of God?

Do I long to be a Masterpiece who is a part of the Heavenly duet?

Pause and thank the Lord for the truths He pours over us from His Word. Praise Him for His love and desire to connect with you. Commit today to be a part of the Heavenly Duet!

Hurt w/out Hopelessness

As Sam and I were traveling home the other day, I started crying. I was listening to some fabulous Christian music about the grace and forgiveness of Jesus and the healing power of God. I let my mind drift and began to realize again how my past is effecting me right now and how it really hurts that consequences don't just go away when you become Christian. But then, the Holy Spirit gave me the most soothing words...like a sunbeam landing on my soul....and I said out loud to Sam...

"It feels so good to hurt without feeling hopeless."

He looked at me with great compassion and amazement and said, "Evie, it is so good to hear you talk like that. You used to hurt so much more and not see that there was hope."

I paused...and took a moment to express my thanks to God for the growth in my life. How beautiful it is to live a life where I can believe the truth and not give in to the lies that want to discourage me and keep me from believing that God is such a loving and good God who cares deeply for me.

And so I place this before you..my fellow Masterpieces...do you allow yourself the gift of hurting, while believing that the amazing hope of our God covers and surrounds you?

Look up these verses and let God speak to your heart (if you can do it in the NLT version it would be best). Add verses that you find that might encourage someone else.

Precious and beloved young women of God, we need to know God's Word and share it with each other so that Jesus is lifted up in our lives!!

Psalm 55:16, 22

Psalm 34:17-19

1 Peter 5:7

Psalm 56:8

For further reflection, ask yourself these questions:

What do I learn about God from these verses?

What do these verses teach me about my relationship with God?

How will these verses impact how I view hurt in my life?

Why can I have hope even when I'm hurting?

Jesus in not a quick fix

How sad...and I wanted so much to have Jesus be a quick fix. After all....it makes Him more attractive. Yet, emotional wounds hurt, pain runs deep, and consequences don't go away just because I want them to go away.

I was listening to a radio speaker talk about addiction and it really hit me; I can either run to Jesus or turn to something else when I'm hurting. My choice determines what kind of journey I go on. I either allow my hurt to propel me toward anything that numbs the pain quickly (drugs, alcohol, sex, cutting, tv) or I choose to crumble to the floor before Jesus.

Jesus will pick me up, hold me close, wipe the tears from my eyes, and speak words of truth and comfort deep into my soul. Sitting on His lap I'll have to wait and rest. It will take time for the wounds to close up. Why? Because through the love of the Holy Spirit He will ask me to face my pain, to deal with why I'm hurting, to think about how things could be different, to question my choices. I have to want that...to be willing to submit to the soul searching that often goes with being at the feet of Jesus.

Yet how much easier it would be...oh so tempting...if I just ran to watch TV, or had a little something to drink, or popped one of those feel good pills, pulled out that razor, or found solace in the arms of some guy who would be more than willing to "physically" comfort me.

Why is it so hard to choose what is wisest when the foolish option so obviously leads down a road with a perilous destination. Oh but Jesus...to run to Him...the road will be difficult, but the final destination will be glorious!

Think about it...

1) What is going on in your life right now that you are not bringing to Jesus?

2) What is keeping you from trusting Him?

3) What are the things that you are using to bring you temporary relief from the pain?

Will you pray with me? Please do if you want to begin to run into His arms and let go of those things that will never bring ultimate healing...

Jesus...I am hurting so badly right now. Thank You that You know my heart like no one else can. I have been running to other things to help ease my pain. Forgive me for not trusting You with what hurts in my life. I want to begin to trust You and believe that You will hold me close and bring healing to my life. I know it will not be a quick fix, so I pray that I will wait on You as You draw me close and speak words of comfort and hope into my life. Thank You for sharing my pain and caring about me enough to walk this hard road with me. Amen

Here are a few Scriptures. Look them up in the NLT if possible (Prov 20:1, Prov 19:3, Ps 34:18, Ps 147:3)

Where do you fix your eyes?

Php 3:12-14, Gal 1:10, Php 1:6

Fix your eyes on Jesus...Keep your eyes on the prize....run the race and keep looking toward the finish line....don't be a people pleaser...

How many times have you heard, "Well so and so calls themselves a Christian and they....(put in whatever awful thing you think fits)"? It's the ever present excuse for not having to live for Christ. The hypocrisy of others is the answer for all sinful behaviors, our complacency and willingness to compromise. After all, how could we be expected to be any better than all those other people?

Let's turn the tables...how often do we hear Christians say, "Well so and so is totally sold out for Christ and so I'm  going to be sold out too!!" Yet the truth is, who are we encouraged to keep an eye on? Obviously Jesus, but who else?

 Those whose lives imitate Christ (look at Paul's words in 1 Cor 11:1...and you should imitate me as I imitate Christ).

Answer these questions:

1) In what areas am I compromising my walk with Christ? (not living according to His Word)

2)  Why do I use those who don't live for Christ as an excuse to live a life that does not honor Him?

3)  Who are the people that God has placed in my life that I can imitate as they imitate Him? and then What can I learn from them?

Today is a new day! We can decide to allow God to live in and through us so that our lives make a difference in this world! He promises He will give us all we need to live for Him (see Php 2:13).

GrafittiedSoul...

Ephesians 4:29

Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.

As I was trying to wrap my mind around the concept of bullying, the Lord gave me the word GraffittiedSoul. It is an interesting word because it portrays the core and the depth of bullying. We all have a soul. And everyday people are writing on it. What they write creates a wall of words. And then I pondered...what does that wall look like? For some of us, it feels like a spray painted wall full of words intended to hurt or wound. It's the epitome of bullying....someone seeking to leave their distinguishing mark behind....yet it finds its place not on a wall, but on our very souls.

As I think of the wall, I picture 4 types of people and the graffiti playing out in their lives. Although categories seem to trivialize the significance of each individual life affected, for the sake of understanding, categorization is necessary. In understanding the GraffitiedSoul it is important to look through the lens of the archetype: the bully, the bullied, the bystander, and the brave.

There are those whose disposition creates in them a need to take their wall of graffiti and turn it on others. These bullies have no intention of going down alone. Because of their own pain and self loathing, they seek to create walls of graffiti that will deflect away from their own wall of pain. The cultivation of an empathetic heart is a choice weapon for waring against the lies that instigate the destructive behaviors.

The bullied are those who have a wall full of words...the wounding is often deep and significant. They have a difficult time escaping the painted images. If truth does not find their hearts, they are left feeling helpless, hopeless, depressed, or even suicidal.

The bystander may or may not have a GraffitiedSoul. However, their inability to stand securely and contend for the victims often comes from a deep seeded apprehension that they will become the recipient of graffiti. Honestly, how easy is it to be vulnerable and open up to a barrage of words that will leave an imprint on the soul? A desire to love at all costs will give them the ability to stand victorious.

And the brave are those who stand securely, unwilling to be pushed into a place of silence. They may or may not have a GraffitiedSoul, but nonetheless, they have made a firm decision to utilize their words to help eradicate the graffiti of the world. They are willing to stand with the bullied, love a bully, and speak truth over a wounded soul. Their words of truth are like fresh paint over the badly marked areas.

Wherever you find yourself today, know that Jesus is among the brave! He has the ability to paint beautiful strokes of vibrant colors over the Graffiti of your Soul. In submitting to the artwork He paints over my life, I no longer live with a wall of Graffiti, but a beautiful canvas of praise!

a small celebration...

Luke 13:20-21 is a great reminder for anyone who is a BIG thinker and sometimes gets frustrated with the "small" tasks involved in ministry. Jesus is faithful to teach and highlight the significance of the "small". Out of all of the ingredients that go into baking bread, the yeast is proportionately one of the smallest. And in comparing the flour/yeast ratio, the yeast would seem to have lesser significance. Yet the yeast is actually the "power". It is the driving force behind flour becoming bread. The concept sits beautifully beside "if you are faithful in the small things, then you will be given greater things". Simply put, we cannot begin with "greatness". The journey unfolds only if the beginning is secure...the "small"must be held in honor and recognized for its significance. 

To celebrate "small" is to be content with obscurity. How easy it is to elevate self and focus on our gifting. Metaphorically speaking, if I am the yeast, I will always cause Jesus to "rise" and be glorified. I can remain the unseen ingredient in the Bread of Life. 

Again and Again and Again...

Judges 4:1-7 - the Israelites AGAIN did what was evil in the Lord's sight. 

As I thought about Judges 4, I grappled first with the whole concept of AGAIN. The thought of again, within this context, saddens me. We are no different than the Israelites. Why is it that we seem to live in the flux of again? Why do we spend multiple moments in disobedience? 

And are we truly cognisant that we do all things "in the sight of the Lord." Maybe if we lived our lives with a greater awareness of His prevailing presence we would not run so quickly into those things that later cause feelings of shame or despair.

True to form the Lord hands the Israelites over to their enemies because of their disobedience. The Lord allowed them to be oppressed for 20 years!! Scripture is replete with stories of those being handed over to their enemies after turning a once faithful heart away from the one true God. How is it that we believe our lives will be any different? We act as though "habitual sin" (read 1 John) is inconsequential. For instance, habitually "not loving" others is an offense that does not go unnoticed by our God. We must not trivialize God's Word...."search me and see if there is any wicked way in me". It is important to "confess our sins", and to have a "tender conscience". However, if we choose to live in deliberate and willful sin, we will pay the consequences...AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN!

The beauty of understanding the love and faithfulness of God gives us the impetus toward freedom from oppression. After the Israelites had been oppressed for 20 years (I never said they were quick learners) they cried out to the Lord. Oh the joy of knowing where our help comes from. They knew exactly where to turn when the inner and outer turmoil became overbearing! And so do we! This same God still reaches down from Heaven and rescues us from...ourselves! 

Verses 6-7 lay the groundwork for freedom. I always find great comfort in the structure laid out in Scripture. I appreciate that God communicates in a way that people like me can really understand....if this, then this, and then this...God certainly is a God of order. We find a distinct pattern for overcoming. First, God gives a command. Second, the people respond to His clear instructions with complete obedience. Third, the surety of victory is set up as dependent on Him..not us...HIM. 

As with the story of the Prodigal son, the Father is always the One who receives the glory. He belongs center stage....AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN.  And I am truly thankful that as His wandering child I receive His promise of Romans 8:28-29 AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN!

Being true to yourself...

Be true to yourself. We hear that often. But what does it mean? I was pondering this question the other day as I thought about the fact that God is always true to Himself.

God never changes. He is love. He can't do anything that is unloving. It's that simple. 

So what about us. Is it that simple for us? Actually it is. Often our attempts at living for God get in the way of God living through us.

So when we finally decide to be "true to ourselves", what we are actually committing to is being true to God and who He has remade us to be in Christ. It's the Gal 2:20 and 2 Cor 5:17 life. 

Join me on the journey of being true to HIM!